School and New Braces!

So much has happened in the last few weeks, I hardly even know where to begin.  School is going great for the kids!  Kaden had a hard time the first few weeks and would cry every time I dropped him off.  Well, for the last couple of weeks he has done great and hasn't cried at all!  Woo Hoo!  I made a deal with him a few weeks ago that I would walk him to the room instead of to the door of the school if he would promise not to cry.  It worked, and he doesn't cry anymore but I am still walking him to the room every day!  All well, whatever it takes to make my babies happy! 

So far, the kids have been sick with colds and croup twice and the stomach flu once.  Two months in to school and three illnesses?  Oh my.  If I was forced to pick an illness, I would take the colds over the stomach flu any day!  Colds might last longer, but the flu is horrible!  It started with Brett on a Tuesday and thankfully only lasted about 4 hours.  Then I woke up Thursday not feeling well.  I had Lee take the kids to school and then had to have my SIL pick the kids up. I even asked Lee to come home early from work because I was so sick.  Every time I stood up I felt like I was going to pass out.  Cooking lunch for the kid that day involved opening a can of soup, microwaving it and dumping it into bowls.  While I was waiting for it to warm up, I had to lay down on the kitchen floor for fear of passing out.  Scary!  I finally felt better by Friday evening.  Then Parker was up all night Saturday night and was fine by Sunday morning.  Then Cooper and Kaden got sick on Sunday afternoon, stayed home from school on Monday and were good by Monday evening.  It was a rough week with very little sleep for me.  I'm happy it's over!

We took Kaden to Omaha for a check up with his pediatric orthopedic doctor.  She feels like he is making improvements with his range of mobility in his ankles!  YAY!   He has completely outgrown his old braces so I took him last week to get casted for new ones.  He still occasionally complains about his knees hurting, especially at school so I am excited for him to get his new braces next week.  If I ever get the pictures of our trip to Omaha and Kaden's appointments off my camera I will post more details about it then! 

One of my favorite Aunts, my Aunt Debbie is not doing well.  She has been battling cancer.  She has put up a good fight, but the cancer has won this fight and her days are numbered.  Pray for her, my friends.  She is ready to go Home to be with Jesus.  Pray that she is able to go Home in peace and pain free.  Her pain has been unbearable for the last several weeks, and she only deserves to be comfortable in her last days. 

My kids are such a blessing and always know how to make me feel better.  I was explaining to them tonight that Nana had to leave lunch early today to go visit Aunt Debbie.  I told them how she is very sick, has cancer and gets to go live with Jesus in Heaven very soon and she won't be sick anymore.  They all know that I am sad, but are quick to remind me that when she gets to Heaven she will feel all better and won't have anymore owies. 

Matthew 12:28 Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.

Preschool?!?!

 

Wow, I really can’t believe that my kids started preschool on Thursday!  It’s hard to believe that my little 1.5 lb. babies are 4 1/2 years old and in school!  Wasn’t it just a few weeks ago that I was holding my babies on my chest and watching their sweet little faces as they slept?  When it comes to kids, the days can be long but the years will fly by!  That is so true, and something I try to remind myself of constantly! 

The first day of school was  a little rough for all of us.  Brett and Cooper were feeling pretty good about school and Parker was thrilled with the idea of being able to play with GIRLS every day!  Kaden was not so very excited about school.  All of my kids are painfully shy and definitely have some social anxiety.  They have never been super comfortable around large groups of people, even if it’s family, and they are very uncomfortable in new situations.  Kaden and Parker struggle with social anxiety the most so it’s no surprise the first couple days of school have been the hardest for them.

The first day of school Lee’s awesome boss let him go in to work a little late so he could help me get the kids to school.  Brett, Parker and Cooper did great getting ready for school, while Kaden cried the whole time. We had to fight him into the van, fight him out of the van, fight him into the school….everything was a battle.  He was latched on to me and not about to let go.  Brett and Coop jumped right in and washed their hands and stood in line to go to breakfast.  At that point, Parker was starting to get nervous and Kaden still wouldn’t let go of me.  We got down to the lunchroom and I told Lee it was time for us to go.  I handed a screaming Kaden to his teacher, Miss Betty and went to say good-bye to the other three.  Brett and Cooper were nervous, but being brave and holding back the tears.  When I leaned down to hug Parker, she started crying and didn’t want to let go.  I had to push her off of me and give her to a teacher she didn’t know, which I’m sure made her feel even worse.  I told her I loved her and walked out the door.  Absolutely the hardest thing I have ever had to do.  I made it outside the school before the tears started flowing!  Lee took me home, gave me instructions to go inside, have a breakdown, and then find something to do to keep myself busy for the next three hours. About 15 minutes later, Lee texted me and said the school had called his phone to let us know that they were fine and no longer crying!  Thank God!  I knew they would be fine since Betty is a good friend of mine and the kids love her, but it was nice to get that call so I could carry on with my day!  I forgot how much I can get done when I am alone in my house!

 

Me and my baby girl!  She looks so grown up with her new haircut!

 

Me and Brett!  Can you tell how excited he was?

 

Cooper didn’t want to smile but at least we got his picture!

 

“Daddy, take my picture again so I can say pickles this time!”-Brett

 

“Daddy, take my picture again too!” –Cooper

 

While we were taking pictures Kaden disappeared.  We found him in the back entry hiding from the camera.  Lee did his best to get a decent picture of him. 

 

I know they all enjoyed their first day of school.  Brett was excited that he got to eat breakfast AND a snack while he was there (the boy loves to eat!).  Cooper didn’t really have much to say except that he had fun, there was only one other boy in class to play with (not really sure how I feel about that), and that he didn’t want to eat breakfast.  Kaden said he didn’t want to eat there, didn’t really like it, and definitely did not ever want to go back!  He did tell me that Miss Betty is the best teacher in the whole world though.  Parker loved that there was tons of girls to play with and said she played with a girl on the swings but couldn’t remember her name.  She wouldn’t tell me if she was excited to go back or not, but I know she liked it! 

My kids have been home with me for the last 4 years.  The only other people they have had take care of them is my parents and Lee’s wonderful sister Stacie a few times.  This is a big change for all of us!  We will all get used to it and preschool will be a good thing for everyone! 

 

More to come later about their second day of school…..right now though, I need to get to bed!  This whole getting up early for school is hard work! 

Where Have You Been???

 

Oh, wait….it’s me that’s been gone from the blogging world for almost a YEAR!  I have been wanting to get back to blogging, but time kept getting away from me and then I had no idea where to even start with blogging again.  Really, after a year, it’s hard to pick a starting point.  I guess I will pick some random events, and get started! 

I can not believe that the kids are 4 1/2 and are going to start preschool in just a few short days.  I am so proud of how far we have come, but preschool?  Already?  I’m not sure I’m ready for it!  It’s only four days a week for 3 1/2 hours each day, but that is way more than I have ever been away from my kiddos!  The short break every day will be nice, and I am excited to be able to clean my house and keep it clean for a few hours every day, and I am super excited to have some ME time….something I very rarely give myself! 

Speaking of being 4 years old…..how about we start by looking back at the kids 4th birthday party (I know it was 6 months ago, but better late than never!)?  They had a great party, with lots of family and special friends.  They all had a different idea for birthday cake ideas, so I compromised and got one big cake divided into four little cakes all with a different design.  They were happy, but I think next year I will make cakes myself and save a little money.  The kids and I love to bake so it will be a fun project for us anyways.  Now…on to some pictures!

The Birthday Cake!  Wiggles for the boys and Princesses for Parker! 

 

Cooper spent the first part of the party snuggled up with Nana.  He got hurt (mostly his feelings) and decided to take full advantage of the alone time with Nana.

Nana and Papa with all 6 of their youngest grandkids.                                                          Brett, Rhidelle, Parker, Rhelynn, Kaden and Cooper (still snuggled up to Nana)

 

Getting ready for the Happy Birthday song(s)

 

Lee and I with our babies (they will ALWAYS be my babies!)

 

Blow out those candles Kaden!

 

Brett listening to everyone sing Happy Birthday to him!

 

Happy Birthday Cooper!

 

Cooper was feeling too shy to blow out his candles

 

Parker wouldn’t look at anyone while we sang Happy Birthday to her

 

The boys showing Aunt Trisha how cool their cake is

 

Opening Presents!  Thanks Uncle Shane, Aunt Vicki and Kenleigh for all the cool new playdough stuff!  Definitely one of our favorite things to play with!

 

More presents!  My kiddos are so blessed to have so many people that love them!

 

Checking out their tennis rackets from Nana.  One of Brett’s favorite gifts!  We use them a lot and Brett is getting pretty good! 

 

More posts coming soon…..I promise! 

Selective Reduction?

I know I haven't posted on here in forever and I'm sure some people will wonder why I am making this the topic of my first post in almost a year.  I can also imagine the controversy that this will cause for some people, and I suppose that I might be opening a huge can of worms by talking about this.  But it's my blog, my opinion and something I feel very strongly about so I can talk about it if I want.  So here goes.....

I have been following a blog about a woman trying to conceive and then getting pregnant with quads.  She lost one of her babies resulting in triplets.  She went through IVF, implanting two eggs, one of which split three times resulting in identical triplets and a singleton.  She lost one of the triplets.  She is now planning on selective reduction.  She hasn't made it clear if she will abort, oh sorry, selectively reduce the twins or the singleton.  She says she will be fine with twins, but when two babies share the same placenta, you can't only reduce one....both will have to be reduced to leave them with one baby or they will reduce the singleton leaving them with twins. I'm not writing this to judge this other woman or attack her.  I know of several people that have made the same decision as her so this is my know means directed at one person.  It's just something I feel very passionate about and want to share my opinion.  I don't know her personally, I've only read about her story. I've followed her journey through trying to conceive and then finally conceiving. I'm not going to like her, or any other person that makes this decision any less because they make the choice to selectively reduce. I am simply writing this in hopes that someone out there that is facing the same decision will read this and think twice about reducing.  Maybe someone will read this and think that it will be ok and that they can do it! 

I have shared before that our pregnancy started as quints and we lost sweet #5 around 8 weeks.  As soon as we found out how many babies we were having, our doctor immediately brought up selective reduction.  I told him no.  No way. No!  Don't even bring it up again, it's not an option.  To me, selective reduction is only a nice way to say abortion.  Abortion, selective reduction....whatever, same thing.  It's all about killing a baby.  Taking a life that God created.  It's wrong.  I believe life begins at conception.  Abortion is wrong.  Not going to happen!  He never brought it up again.  When we met with our high risk doctor for the first time he also brought it up.  He said he knew we weren't considering it,  but he still had to talk about it.  So he told us all the risks and I still told him it wasn't an option.  I left his office knowing that, God willing, I was going to carry four babies.  I know there are times when reduction is the only option. If a baby has a condition that it is 100% known he won't live outside the womb and reducing him would give the other babies a better chance at survival, then that is different. What I am talking about here is situations like ours.  Where all the babies appear to be healthy and developing fine.

Now, let me honest.  Totally, brutally honest.  This next part is hard for me to write.  It's not something I'm proud of.  I hate this part of myself, these thoughts that went through my head. I walked out of the doctor's office with my head held high.  I knew what my decision was, that we would continue with the quad pregnancy and hope and pray for the best.  Once we got in the car though, I had a breakdown.  Complete and total breakdown.  I started really freaking out.  Four babies???  Holy shit, I can't do that.  Four?  We can't afford that!  We don't have a big enough house, big enough car, enough money!  I will need to work just to support these babies, but I don't want to work and how could I work?! I would be working to pay daycare!  I want to have ONE baby, be a stay at home mommy.  Spoil him or her rotten. Focus all my attention on ONE baby....not four!  I told Lee maybe we should consider reducing.  He looked at me like I had completely lost my mind (I think I had).  I had always said I was very strongly absolutely opposed to abortion and there I was completely freaking out and basically saying that I thought we should reduce our pregnancy!  After Lee was able to calm me down and I regained my composure, I realized what I was saying.  It was a weak moment that I am not proud of.  I was saying that I didn't want all of my babies that we had created!  Ha!  I was having ridiculous, crazy thoughts and I actually laughed at myself.  Yes, I was still scared out of my mind but I knew it would be ok. I think I briefly panicked and had to say all the thoughts in my head and hear them out loud to reaffirm what I already knew. I knew that we could do it.  I knew it would be hard, but I knew that it was the blessing I had been given and I accepted that.  God gave me these babies so I was responsible for them.  I would never give one of my babies up. I was going to do everything I could to protect them, carry them as long as I could and give them the best chance for a good life. 

I knew all the risks.  I knew that higher order multiples have a huge risk of being born with serious disabilities.  I knew we would deliver early and most likely spend some time in the NICU.  I babysat triplets for several years starting when I was in high school.  I knew how much work multiples would be.  I knew we were going to be short on money, completely broke actually, for the next several years, well, the rest of our lives really.  I knew everything was going to be hard, really, really hard.  I also knew that it was going to be ok. 

My babies were born at 23 weeks and 5 days.  They technically shouldn't have survived.  They should have had major complications.  Don't get me wrong, they had their share of difficulties those first few months.  For the first couple months we didn't know if they were going to make it.  The 137 days they spent in the NICU were the hardest thing I have ever done.  It changed me forever.  But it changed me forever in a good way.  I have a much greater appreciation for the little things in life.  I have a stronger faith in God.  I believe in myself more.  The days after they came  home were hard too.  Cooper came home on oxygen and all but Brett were on monitors.  I constantly had people in my house.  I needed the help so that was a good thing, but it was hard.  Our marriage has been pushed almost to the breaking point, but we stuck it out and now we are better than ever.  I rarely slept when they were babies.  I was tired all the time.  I was physically, mentally, emotionally exhausted.  But I was so full of love for my babies, that it was worth it.  Snuggling my sweet babies was amazing.  I never had empty arms because there was always someone that wanted to be held.  It was awesome.  Kaden  has cerebral palsy and wears braces on both legs.  He has sensory issues that have made a lot of things difficult for him.  Cooper still has some breathing issues. They have mild problems that we deal with everyday.  It should have been more serious issues.  If my children were severely disabled I wouldn't love them any less.  I can't imagine not loving an incredible gift straight from God. After trying for so long to get pregnant, I would love my children no matter what.  Sometimes the days with my kids are sooooo long and soooo difficult.  Sometimes I hide in the bathroom and cry because I can't do it anymore.  Sometimes when Lee gets home from work, I leave.  I go to the park.  I enjoy the silence. 

But then I go home to my kids.  All four of them.  I wouldn't change it for anything.  I love the way my life has turned out.  Who would of thought that having four kids would meet every expectation of my life I have ever had.  My kids are amazing.  They are beautiful.  Wonderful.  Incredible little people that fill my heart with so much love that I feel like I could burst.  What an amazing feeling.  I quite possibly could be the luckiest mom in the world. 

If we would have opted for reduction, we would have aborted Brett and Kaden.  Oh, how that thought hurts my heart.  I can't imagine not having my buddy Brett.  My momma's boy.  The boy that doesn't like to be away from me.  I can't imagine not hearing his giggle, watching him sleep, hugging him every morning.  What would life be like without Kaden? Daddy's little mini me. To not hear his "I love you, mommy" every day.  To not get hundreds of kisses from him everyday.  To not hear his knock, knock jokes, see him entertain everyone and work hard to make sure that everyone around him is happy! 

Sorry I have rambled for so long and congratulations if you actually made it to the end of this.  Please, if you are considering abortion or selective reduction, think about it again.  Think long and hard and make sure it's something you really want to do.  Something you really want to live with for the rest of your life.  Feel free to comment, but please keep in mind that this is only my opinion.  It's something I feel strongly about and wanted to share my thoughts. 



Cooper, Brett, Parker and Kaden

The Park

This summer was hot and humid.  Last year we never had a day over 100, but this summer was much hotter and way more humid!  Last year we went for a walk almost every morning and went to the park all the time.  This year we walked a few times in June and played at the park a few times too, but after that it just got to hot and humid.  My kids are just like me, they love to be outside but only if the heat isn't unbearable or if it is, if they have a way to stay cool.  So we have spent most of our summer swimming, playing in the sprinkler and playing on the slip n slide.  We were outside everyday, but we always had water to play in to keep us cool! 
This last week has been awesome!  It hasn't gotten warmer than 75 to 80 and we have been taking advantage of it.  Every day since Sunday we have played at a different play area in town (parks and school playgrounds).  The kids and I have been loving it! 
Yesterday the kids asked to go to the park again, and wanted to have a picnic in the park.  So we got some McDonald's Happy Meals and hit the park.  We are usually so busy playing, that I don't even think to snap a picture very often, so I unfortunately don't have many pictures of our adventures. 

Kaden, Parker, Cooper and Brett
I love that they all wanted to sit on the same side of the table together!

Cooper, Parker, Brett and Kaden
They don't like to ride on the merry go round, but they love to push it. 

We are missing our "big kid" friends and cousins that came to play with us a lot over the summer, but we sure are happy to have this cooler weather! If only it could stay this way and we could have a short, warm winter!  I have lots of other pictures to share from our other recent adventures, so hopefully I can find time soon to post them!  

The Fair!

We took the kids to fair the other night.  Mostly just to eat and then to walk around.  Well, once they saw the rides, they wanted to ride.  I honestly didn't think they would, but I figured we would give it a try.  First we rode on the "horsies".  When we first got on, they were a little leary but as soon as it started, they loved it!  Brett wouldn't even get on the horse at first, but once it started moving, he pushed me away and said "I wanna do that!"

Parker and Papa

Brett and Nana

Cooper, Daddy and Kaden

 After we rode on the horsies, Brett said he wanted to ride on the cars.  So we decided to watch them a couple of times a see if they still wanted to.  They did, so we got more tickets and got in line. 

They all jumped right in and were excited to go.  Then Parker decided the cars weren't her cup of tea and wanted out.  The boys had a great time, and Kaden even cried when the ride was over.

They enjoyed it so much that we had to go again.  This is Kaden trying to figure out how to honk the horn.

Brett and Cooper

 After we pulled them away from the cars, we had to try out the boats.  Parker didn't want to ride, so her and Nana headed back to ride the horsies some more.  I think Parker rode the horsies 5 or 6 times.

Cooper in the middle row, Brett and Kaden in the back row. 

This is my favorite picture from the whole night!!!  Brett wanted to ride the boats one more time, but everyone else was done.  I walked him in, figuring he would decide he didn't want to go by himself but he had no problem with it.  When I asked him where he wanted to sit, he pointed to the seat next to this little girl.  I put him in, she helped him buckle up and he was ready to go.  I think she was a little embarrassed that I kept taking pictures, but Brett looked too cute! 

We all had a great time and can't wait to go again next year.  Or maybe we will even brave the 6 hour drive to Kansas City to try out Worlds of Fun!!!!  (Maybe)

The Circus

I was just looking through all the pictures I have recently uploaded to my computer and realized how much has happened in the last few weeks that I haven’t shared on here or on facebook.  Hopefully I can get caught up and take some time to blog about some of the stuff that we have been up to lately!  It feels like we go, go, go in the summer time, and blogging tends to take a back seat to all of the other stuff we do.

A few weeks ago I heard that the circus was going to be in Kearney.  I saw it advertised on tv and realized it was the next day.  It never fails that Lee has to work on the days that stuff like that is going on, so I started thinking of who I could call to go with us.  My mom had just had surgery for a detached retina, so her and my dad who always go to stuff like that with us, were out of the question.  I called several people, but since it was pretty short notice, everyone was busy.  I decided I was going to take the kids by myself.  I’m perfectly capable of taking my kids places by myself, it’s just easier to have a second set of hands. 

My mother in-law came to my rescue, called back and said that she could go with us.  Well, thank goodness she did since the kids freaked out before we even got inside the building!  We walked up to the door where 3 or 4 clowns were standing to take tickets.  Oh my goodness!  The kids completely freaked out!  I was holding two of them and Sue had two of them.  I’m not even really sure how I managed to get money out of my pocket since they had death grips on me.  Poor Cooper was squeezing my neck so hard I could hardly breath.  I don’t even want to think about how hard it would have been to get them inside by myself!  Thank God for Grandma Sue!

After we got inside, we found seats and they were still pretty nervous about the clowns.  Grandma came to the rescue and bought them all flashing butterfly lights.  I think Sue and I were both seeing spots by the time the circus was over, but it was totally worth it since they cheered up and started enjoying themselves after that. 

Parker showing me her butterfly.

Silly Kaden and his butterfly

Brett mesmerized by the flashing lights

Cooper

Kaden enjoying the show

Cooper and Brett

Cooper, Brett, Parker, Grandma, and Kaden

Such a big girl!

I don’t normally take pictures of the animals at the circus, but the kids wanted to show daddy what they saw.  This elephant was the best part of the show!  She danced and it was just plain awesome!  The kids kept saying, “It’s so big!  That elephant so big!”  They don’t remember seeing the elephants at the zoo last year and even though we look at pictures of elephants all the time, they didn’t realize just how big they are.

We had a great time at the circus!  Thank you so much, Grandma, for going with us!  Having you there made the clowns seem a little less scary and definitely made all those trips to the bathroom a lot easier!